Primary Elections are today.
Go Vote!
“Go Vote!” they all say.
But does it even matter?
I am just one in a sea of many.
“If it mattered, I would vote” says the Cynical.
But…
I voted today!
Does it make a difference?
I don’t know.
But I figure I can’t complain about the state of affairs unless I first have voted.
So, now I get to be like ‘them’
and say…
“GO VOTE!”
Projecting.
Thinking ahead.
Worrying.
But this is a waste of head space!
What a waste of waste of head space.
Thinking of this.
Thinking of that.
What if he does this?
What if she does that?
So what?
What if they don’t?
What if they do?
Either way I will have to react accordingly.
It has not even happened yet.
Why waste the head space?
Enjoy the moment now.
Palm trees and water!
I will miss that view!
I AM missing that because my head space is fogged.
Clear the Fog!
Just do it.
Maybe Nike was right.
Just do it.
Just do something!
Shake off the fear.
And just do it!
No one cares!
No one cares!
No ONE CARES!
No one cares about me!
Not is a depressive, self-pity way.
No, not at all!
No, it is in a freeing way!!
It is freeing that no one cares!
Like, no one actually cares!
Everyone is too worried about THEM!
I heard something good: ” It is not self-conscious, but OTHER conscious that limits us”.
So, I am too worried about others
And not worried about myself.
Therefore, now….
Focus on YOU!
You MATTER!
You DO YOU!
Because that is all YOU can Do!
BE YOU!
Too much worry!
What does it matter?
What does it all even matter?
Why try?
Does it even matter?
But, not wondering in a depressed way.
More in a freeing way!
What does it matter?
What does it matter?
What does it matter?
I mean, what is the worst that can happen?
What is the worst that can happen?
That is freeing!
Live Free!
Freedom!
Freedom!
Freedom!
No hindrances.
Break down the walls.
Live Free!
No Barriers!
Live Free!
Trying to do too many things.
I got good advice from a colleague:
“Bro, TAKE IT EASY MAN!”
Just take it easy!
Yes, That’s it!
Take it easy man!
But why is it so hard to just take it easy?
Everything will work out.
In its own way.
Just stop controlling.
But that is hard.
Take it easy!
Why am I trying to control?
IT WILL BE OK!
It’s noon.
Housemate is still asleep.
Has a girl over.
I’m trying to be quiet.
But this is B.S.
He’s the prick!
And now I’m walking on eggshells.
Screw him!
Not in the mood to write.
I have a headache.
It hurts right behind my eyes.
Like a hammer hit to my head.
Also, feeling sick.
Congestion.
Stuffiness.
Sinus aches.
Body aches.
Aches.
I am pissed off!
I don’t want to be sick!!
I am angry!
I want to be well!
Anger.
Anger again.
Always angry!
Always back to the anger.
Am I sick because I am angry?
I need to let this go!
So I can be WELL!
Getting fed up.
Been tolerating too much BS lately.
I am not a doormat!
I need to make a change.
A drastic change?
Maybe!
Change it up!
But how?
With a STORM!
But, a Storm causes damage.
And, requires a cleanup.
But, a Storm does create change.
Is it the change I want?
I don’t know.
But I do know after the clean up it is calm.
The calm after the Storm!
Is the cleanup worth the Storm?
Is the change worth the Storm?
I don’t know.
But I need some change.
And sometimes change only comes after a Storm.
So here we GO!
It is time to cause a STORM!
Brewing.
Stewing.
Steeping.
Waiting.
Alone.
Waiting.
Isolated.
In my head.
Thoughts.
Thoughts in my head.
Thinking.
Thinking.
Thinking.
Too much thinking.
Too many thoughts.
Yeah, that’s the problem.
Too much thinking.
And too many thoughts!
Been doing too much thinking.
Maybe I should go talk to someone?
